Introduction
My anxiety is something I rarely talk about, and if I ever talk about it, it’s hushed and only with my family members. I usually tell people about my sleep anxiety, which is a big part of my struggle, but not all of it. When I was younger, I would sleep in my parents’ room many nights because I was terrified of not being able to fall asleep. As I got older, my anxiety grew into social situations as I would feel like throwing up before parties and big events.
For this experiment, I want to talk about my anxiety and how I have begun to overcome it. I would like to start with a memory of anxiety, then talk about my history with anxiety, and then talk about the progress that I have made through medication, therapy, and just lifestyle choices. I want my audience to be young people struggling with mental health, because I think my personal essay in its entirety will show that things truly can get better!
Genre Research
The genre that I am choosing for Experiment #2 is the personal essay. I plan on writing a piece that covers a topic that is extremely meaningful to me. To learn more about the genre, I read a few pieces online. The first was “What is a Personal Essay?” by Dave Hood. Hood explains that the uniqueness of the personal essay relative to something more formal is that the personal essay is not argumentative in nature; it does not need to prove some point to be an essential essay. Next, I read “The Personal Essay Boom is Over,” by Jia Talentino, and she explained that many personal essays shocked the world by being so personal.
I then read a personal essay by Rachel Sacks and tried to learn from it. In “I’m Not Going To Pretend That I’m Poor To Be Accepted By You,” Sacks writes with clear emotion that really personifies herself as an author. She also does not hold back with her language, using curse words and informalities to convey her stream of consciousness. I learned that writing one’s thoughts is a crucial part of a personal essay. The genre encompasses pieces from a variety of lengths and styles, but that is the beauty of it. The only commonality between all works in the genre is that they include emotions and tell true, personal stories without holding back. I hope to formulate a personal essay that is true, clear, and meaningful.
Sample
The dripping water from the off-white sink sounds like rain as I gag into the sink after brushing my teeth just a bit too close to my throat, and nausea overtakes me. Today is an important day, and on important days, I wake up with everything being a trigger. These are the only days that drinking my coffee and eating breakfast are insurmountable burdens. It’s almost time to walk to school, but I still have to finish brushing my teeth. I hold onto the faucet and look into the mirror.
“I will not throw up,” I say out loud to myself, and I continue to get ready for school. Once I arrive at the first period, I know the moment of truth is coming soon: when my ACT score will come out, and as the clock ticks toward 9 AM, I run to the bathroom to check it, but once I am in the stall, the score does not matter, because my nerves have gotten the best of me and I am puking into the toilet.
My anxiety is not pretty, but it is mine.